Dreaming is Easy

Just have time for a little Journal Jar entry, so let's get going...

Describe a recurring dream you had as a child, a teen or an adult.

I have a couple recurring dreams to choose from here, but my thought is to instead recite one of my earliest recollections of a dream.  When I was very young, probably about 5 or so, I remember having a dream that my dad was featured on a family sit com on television.  The show was in black and white, and my dad was some sort of robot that kept falling apart to a laugh track.  Various parts would fall off and scurry around on the hard wood floors and people would laugh hysterically.  Don't know why I remember this.  I always meant to ask my parents about that time, and if there was a similar tv show that they recalled being on when I was that age.  But I could never remember to ask them.  So maybe they'll read this and have an answer for me and I can finally put that memory to rest...

Other recurring thoughts or dreams include the dream where I can't wake up.  I think I wrote about it here before, where I feel like I'm trapped in a comatose body that I can't control, but I try to wake up and can only muster little bits of activity...  The more recent recurring dream that I have is about being back in college, finishing up my degree, or just being back in school (be it high school or college) and reliving those experiences with my broader perspective that I've gained by living my life the past twenty plus years. 

The settings in my dreams are almost always elaborate and labyrinthine at times.  I dream in great detail, with lush surfaces and finely decorated structures.  Most of my dreams are filled with a sense of wonder and curiosity, of inspiration and nurturing.  I usually enjoy dreaming, even when the dreams startle me.  There is usually some sort of lesson.  It isn't always spelled out in plain language.  In fact it rarely translates to words.  But there is emotion that is real and exhilarating.  My dreams make me hopeful.  They recharge my imagination.

I think that's why I like to sleep so much.  There is so much more possible in the dream world, or so it seems.  In reality, it's all possible.  Imagining it into existence is what it takes to make it real.

Imagine All the Writing

"...without imagination of change you can't have change.  It's the imagination that comes first." -- Gloria Steinem

So they suspended my AdSense account because of "invalid clicks" or something.  Basically, they are on to me and my friends and they don't like us because we're parasites.  And they like the advertisers better because they're paid to do so.

So no more ads on my blog.  The experiment is over.  I will not make any money from my blogging.  At least not this way that seemed so easy and possible for a little bit.

So now what?

Now the real shit starts.

Back to writing for writing's sake.  Back to getting it all down on the paper because it has to come out, not because it has to satiate and entice readers.  Back to the content being what I am not what I wish I could be.  Or not what I wish I could be-- more like trying to be something I'm not to make people like me.

Genuine draft.  That's what this is.  Find the ingenuity.  Genius is in you.  Let it out.

The Gloria Steinem quote above is from a movie I watched last night, "One Bright Shining Moment," a documentary chronicling the George McGovern candidacy for president.  I enjoyed it.  Maybe you would too.  You can stream it on Netflix like I did.  It's haunting to retrace those steps in our history, but inspiring too. 

Another quote, this time from Albert Einstein: "Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow."  That is festooned to the wall above the "blackboard" in the room where my NAMI Peer to Peer course is being held every Wednesday afternoon.  Two weeks in and so far so good.  There are some neat people in class, and every week there are snacks.  How great is that?  Free information and they feed you, too.

So I guess we'll see what happens.  Still gonna do Journal Jar 'til it's empty, aiming to have it done by end of the year.  So I hope you have fun reading along, trying on this life with me.